assalamualaikum
this is an extension of my birthday post in facebook.
i have used to growing up without telling people how i actually feels. But it come with price. i get misunderstood with my words easily, hence i feel comfortable writing than speaking. but writting is not loud enough for people to listen.
life at 23, i have those moment where i cried my heart our seeking help but no one is there. It's sad. i never really understand why people dont tell or seek help when they in need. not until i was at the same place once upon time. it was really dark, scary, hurtful and sarrow to just cry, feeling hurt but could not think of anyone to seek help to. i guess its all come back to how we act around people and how we let people and treat us in the first place. I was portrayed strong. Never weak enough not to be able to handle problems. never weak enough to solve a dispute. But deep inside i know i am weak and never been weak when it comes to my own heart.
I tried to show the fragile me but not many people see or even accept it. They have this unspoken aura or manners that keep telling me i cannot be weak and should remain strong. But i let them to be weak why cant i?
hence, i give my hand to companion that i never felt before, boys. Thinking that they will be different and may accept me differently, i was in disappointment. Bring me here today, with a mindset, i dont need outsider to make myself feels valuable or even approved. i am the only person who approved myself and no thanks for any unintellectual discrimination.
happy 23rd myself.
Be brave, you are young and cute.
